Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate With Your Baby by Melinda Blau and Tracy Hogg (2002, Paperback, Reprint)

BW saved our family! I was ready to run away from home when my son was 1.5 months old - then someone gave us this book! And now everyone wants to know why we have such a well behaved baby during the day, and goes to sleep on his own happyily, and sleeps 12 hrs at night! It's a logical, middle of the road approach - instead of the more popular parenting styles of going to one extreme or the other. It just makes sense - and helps you interpret what your child is trying to tell you! There some basic components that all babies need - but then it tells you how to adjust and personalize for each personality of baby. IT WORKS FOR ALL BABIES - but i've seen a few PARENTS who it did not suit - so they went their own way -- and I've seen the baby suffer for it. Remember when changing ANY babies patterns and expectations, they will fight it. But after THREE days you will begin to see results (as that is how long a baby's memory is). A previous review said they gave up on the third day! how sad! only one more day would have changed their world completely! Our baby was perfectly sleep trained in only two weeks at the age of 2 months old. Having a predictable schedule was fantastic! I only wish we had started earlier!

Background:
This books came highly recommended by our neigbors who had a daughter 10 days after ours. Given the high accolades and best seller status, we thought this book would be a sure winner and help us get our daughter to sleep better and reduce her crying.

Book Summary:
The "Baby Whisperer" method is to put your baby on a structured "schedule", to help them establish a predictable rythm of sleeping and eating that can help the parents also get some predictability for eating (and hopefully sleeping).

The process to get your baby on this system according to the book, takes 3 days, which involve picking up the baby when it cries and then as soon as it stops, putting the baby back down immediately, and NOT soothing the baby with rocking or other methods.

Did it work?:
While the Baby Whisperer method seems to have worked wonderfully for our neighbor's baby, it was a complete disaster for us and our baby. Our baby cried for 3 days straight as we tried to get her onto this sytem, which also meant that mom was crying for 3 days straight. NOT GOOD! (No fun for the entire family.) Even our pets were upset with all the crying in the house!

We consulted our pediatrician, who said that babies under 3 months do not have the cognative ability to be put on a schedule as their actions are driven more by their immediate needs for hunger, sleep, diaper changes, and desire for a sense of security through affection/cuddling/rocking/soo​thing with mom and dad. Our pediatrician recommended we try the book "The Happiest Baby on the Block" (eBay Search: http://search.ebay.com//search​/search.dll?&satitle=Happi​est+Baby+Block ). We did so and found that this "Happiest Baby on the Block" book by Dr. Harvey Karp M.D. was much more aligned with our personal parenting style and our baby immediately was much happier and essentially has not cried at all in the 5+ months since.

Our Advice:
If you do try the methods suggested in "The Baby Whisperer", use your common sense and figure out if it is working or not for your baby. If not, I suggest you buy the "Happiest Baby on the Block" book (ISBN 0553802550 hardcover and 0553381466 softcover) as that method worked wonders for us.

Every baby (and parenting style) is different and it seems each baby will gravitate towards the method that works best for them.

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This book was recommended to me by a couple of friends. It was very easy to read and I was quickly captured by the prospect of an EASY method to connect with and calm my 3.5 month old baby. I was not, however, very happy with the results of trying to implement this EASY method, especially getting to the Y (time for yourself) part. Perhaps if I had someone to come live in my house for awhile to help out or if I at least had family living closer or maybe if this were my only child and I wasn't trying to get a baby on a strict routine while keeping up with a toddler too...

While describing her EASY method though, Mrs. Hogg has some very useful tips for both breast and bottle feeding, activity time for babies, sleep solutions (just keep in mind your own personalities and that of your baby!), and suggestions for taking care of yourself. This book was also helpful in getting me to slow down a little and "listen" to what my baby was saying to me.

I think not all babies, or not all parents, are well suited for Ms. Hogg's EASY method outlined in this book, but I definitely recommend reading the book for the other information.

I don't yet have a baby, so I haven't put the guidance to the test, but I appreciated the information the author includes on the baby's development to help parents understand the care they need (swaddling at what ages, how much food, etc.). There is also very helpful, basic information on how to do so many of those baby tasks - bath, put down for sleep, feed, care for bottles, appropriate play and interaction.
I did disagree with the author's viewpoint that breast milk and formula are equally fine and each mother should make the best choice. Other reports show clear benefits of breast milk and breast-feeding, though I know not everyone is able to breast feed.

As a new mother there were many things I did not know. A friend gave this book to us and my husband and I read it outloud for the 1st 3 chapters and we were hooked. Tracy Hogg gave such practical advice that was very effective with all 3 of our children. We used her acronyms (SLOW & EASY) over and over again. I kept the book in the baby's room for the first year and referred to it often for various subjects. We now give this as a gift to all new parents that we know. I always say this book will save your life if you read. I am sad that Tracy Hogg has passed away, but am so thankful that we had to opportunity to read her book.